Tuesday, July 22, 2008

A Headache - In 6 Easy Steps


Step 1 - Begin drinking early - like say, 4 o'clock in the afternoon.  Blame child for early drinking.  Girl child wanted to see Mamma Mia and so you did and felt so full of ABBA goodness that you...

Step 2 - Answered a phone call from a friend whose children were in need of a swim and instead of just saying, Of course, come over!  You say, Of course, come over and bring some wine...

Step 3 - Send friend to Spigot Liquor for more wine.

Step 4 - Don't eat anything... do encourage parents of other children to come over and yes, sure, bring some wine...

* do you see a pattern of destruction here?*

Step 5 - Welcome your husband home to a house of inebriated adults and unsupervised children... be very happy when husband suggests Thai food.... ask if he can get some more f*cking w*ne while picking up dinner.

Step 6 - Wake up feeling not unlike you would if someone placed your head in a clamp and then strapped you a Tilt-A-Whirl.  Remember why you don't drink much anymore... consider canceling hair appointment... look at roots and take more Tylenol.


24 comments:

jennie said...

oh the "wine is fun" spiral, I've been there too. good luck today!

Issas Crazy World said...

Oh I'd kill for some wine. It seems like you drank my share huh? Feel better.

jenontheedge said...

But of course you need to take care of your roots, no matter how bad your hangover. Priorities, dear.

Marisa said...

At least wine fades with the help of painkillers... tequila stays with you for days.

furiousBall said...

that wine stuff sure is tasty

CDJ said...

Yummmmmmm... next time, invite me!

dgm said...

Maybe it's just the flu--that's what I always tell myself.

Joe said...

Equally effective: Head into a bar at around noon on a summer day. Drink for several hours with friends. Emerge in late afternoon to blinding sunshine. Instant headache...instant hangover.

Los said...

Sounds like you need a little bit of the hair of the dog that bit ya ....

Kristin said...

Joe - ooohhh... the bright light, that is a beeyotch.

Anonymous said...

This is why I only smoke pot.

SabineM said...

hmm been there done that!
I love anonymous answer....

cousin it said...

Well, you'll get nothing but sympathy from me,something that is usually in short supply around the house"the day after"

gorillabuns said...

Sounds like my life before I got knocked up again, sans the pool.

Anonymous said...

oh, so this is why you didn't come to play group.... i am thinking you had the right idea, though. sans, the next day "headache" , isn't this what summer is all about?

Nicki

Amy Y said...

It's all about the water... Drink tons of water before you go to bed and the next morning you'll only need one dose of Tylenol!

Trooper Thorn said...

We don't get any wiser as we get older. We just find better ways to manage our stupidity.

It's been two days now since my last "fun" night.

Grim Reality Girl said...

Just know that if you called me I'd be there with more wine in a heartbeat. That's the kind of friend I am... the one that brings the one and calls hubby to drive me home. Yum wine.

hippo brigade said...

Oh, so THAT"S how you get a headache. I've been doing it all wrong and without the aid of wine...what the hell was I thinking? From now on, if I want a headache I will pour liberally.

Anonymous said...

"Don't eat anything"

That's where I suspect it all went wrong.

Lori Anderson Designs said...

OMG hilarious. And wine + heat of the outdoors = spinning mommy.

Jason said...

Oh, boy. My advice is, just do this every day and then you won't feel so bad the next day.

The head in clamp tilt a whirl description was excellent.

Jason said...

And this comment is just to confirm to you that I am definitely stalking you today. :)

Poppy Buxom said...

This is my life! Except the part about having a swimming pool.

I do have the roots, though. Score!