Wednesday, June 11, 2008


Yesterday, as I heard Jack coming out of the bathroom, I reflexively called out, "Soap & Water!"

Jack sighed loudly, stomped down the hall and informed me that he is 10 and he knows to wash his hands thankyouverymuch.

He went on to say, Mom, when you die, your gravestone is going to read: Soap & Water!

And, Jake, chimed in, Sit Properly So The Seatbelt Can Do It's Job!

or, Jack added, I don't work for you!

Don't forget,  Will you do it for a dollar?

and finally - Your feet smell like a**! (oh yeah, I've said that - often)

I cut them off after that last one, but now I want to know, what's on your tombstone?


Shelley said...

"Sit properly so the seat can do its job?" Now THAT's one I haven't heard.

Off the top, mine would be: "Enough!"

...and "because I said so."

Kristin said...

ooops - typo there Shell.. it's seatbelt!

furiousBall said...

stop staring at my crotch

dgm said...

"Chillax, man. Let it go." and "I want you to take 5 deep breaths before you speak to me."

Amy Y said...

"quick! like a bunny!"

I do the seatbelt one, too.

Oh, and "did you brush your teeth?".

And... "let's take a bath ~ you don't want to be the stinky kid, do you?"

Kristin said...

FB - You told me you didn't mind when I did that...

DGM - Chillax! You & Jake!

Amy - Oh, Eva would love "Quick, like a bunny!"

Maggie said...

"Don't do that or you'll get an infection."

(I'll leave the details of that to your imagination!)

Tami W. said...

"What where you thinking when you______" (fill in the blank.)

Anonymous said...



Your dirty laundry belongs in the hamper, not on your floor.

jennster said...

LMFAO! omg, that is HILARIOUS!!!!!!!!!

Anonymous said...


Kristin said...

Maggie - I am sure I have seen it before...

Tami - You'll never know!

Jen -Not flushing seems to be the domain of the girls... Eva is notorious for simply "walking away".

Jennster - I like OMG - I think it hits home!

Jen - Shallow Steps Bother Me

Los said...

Hmmmm - never gave this much thought.

Some of my favorite comments include:

"So, I got that going for me."
"That's what she said."
"ummmph, fat."

Jenn @ Juggling Life said...

If it's worth doing it's worth doing right.

Joannah said...

"Boys and girls, I want you on task. This should be a quiet classroom right now."

Gawd, I must say that a hundred times a day!

Kristin said...

Los - You're Michael from The Office!

Jenn - Hmmm, I say this too, but I don't really live it... I'm more of a, shall we say, slacker...

Joannah - "on task" - my favorite teacher phrase ever!

CDJ said...

I'm sure this will change over the years (so, very very very very very very sure, but I'm riding a high today)....

"Mom of the best baby ever"

Good mood. Obviously.

Denise said...

I'm NOT your maid service. said daily

Lisa said...

Oh that is so funny! That's one of the best things about having siblings -- that you get to bond by laughing at all of the things your mom says...

My tombstone would read, "Are you wearing underwear? We can't go to Grandma's unless you are wearing underwear." (The boy likes to go commando. This upsets grandma.)

Oh and "Get your finger out of your nose."

Anonymous said...

Just simply "WTF??!!??"

~ Lisa

Becky said...

"DON'T FORGET" in big letters because i'm constantly adding that to the end of my nagging!

Gen said...

Umm - Will you do it for a dollar?

Now that is guaranteed to stop a lot of passer-bys!

Mine would be "Save the drama" or "Can't you smell that your daddy's home?" me and let me know you can make it out to see us :)

Meg said...

delurking to comment on this one- too funny!
"Mama has feet" (all three seem to step on them hourly)

"I'm your mom not your maid"

and the one I'm famous for:

"could you please get out of my back pocket for awhile"?

carrie said...

Stop Screaming I'm Driving, of course!

And, Keep your hands to yourself (this goes for the kids AND the hubs).

Jodi said...

"Say, okay Mommy".

"Do not touch your brother. Do not talk to your brother. Do not talk about or touch your brother's butt. Got it?".

"OH my GOD Trent, please spray something in there and close the door. Did something die?"

"Go wash your hands with SOAP this time...."

And it goes on and on. :) I like yours better.

heartshapedhedges said...

If you dont like the rules in our family, Id be happy to find you another one.


Be quiet, the baby is sleeping.