Friday, June 06, 2008

The Hollywood Men & Me

For the second time in a mere few weeks I walked a red carpet, and, for the second time in a mere few weeks, I was completely ignored by the paparazzi... rat bastards.

However, for Omarosa? Well, they practically killed themselves to get a photo op  with her, and, if we're being truthful, her rather awesome cheetah print Dolce & Gabbana.

And for Bai Ling?  More of the same... as in, OMFG, it's BAI LING!  She's a national treasure!  Snap photos, you fools!

I got asked to show my I.D.

The backstory to this our very good friend Matt, aka Hot Dog, a former MLB player (Toronto Blue Jays) (I think) and MLB scout (Phillies) has produced a reality show on the "Viagra for Women" all male revue, The Hollywood Men.

It's a behind the scene look at the life of some very buff men who, along with having buns of steel, are rather nice and interesting.

The most interesting thing to me is that most of them are straight.

So last night was a screening of the pilot episode at the Highlands Club in Los Angeles...  an amazing venue... giant rooftop bar with fireplaces and flat screen monitors and lots of modern and chic lounges... we were nothing if not out of place.

The crowd consisted of very small women with very giant breasts and very short and very small dresses... most would have been hard pressed to sit down and not show the world their appendix.

The men were equally buff and shined and tanned and manscaped.  

Then there was myself, Tori and Jenn.

We looked like the OC Housewives that we are.  

Housewives who had just gorged themselves on sushi and sake at Yamashiro.

And who were about to gorge themselves again on pie at Du-pars.

And maybe a certain one of those housewives had a thing against "hot fruit" and took it personally when an apricot pie was ordered and so in retaliation ordered pumpkin pie which went against everything a certain hot fruit eating housewife holds sacred in the world of desserts... 

And it took 2 hours to get home thanks to midnight road construction and so today we are tired but still laughing about the guy who tried to give us some avocados while we were driving down the freeway.

13 comments:

jenontheedge said...

Photos??? What did you wear?

carrie said...

You do lead a glamorous life - I ended my lovely evening with lovely women in an awesome Seattle wine bar surrounded by drugs and tattoos. Seriously.

Kristin said...

Jen - I wore a black wrap dress over a pair of white linen pants. with stilettos... the Fug girls might not like the look, but I love it! If you can imagine, not one of us threw a camera in her bag!

Carrie - Darling, it's more odd than glamorous...

Anonymous said...

still laughing, but not too hard 'cuz I gotta pee.

Anonymous said...

I think we need some photos of this!

Jodi said...

what? no pics? Come on, post some pics!!!

Kristin said...

Anon & Jodi - I've nothing for you... or me... it's tragic that we forgot cameras!

Amanda said...

Hmmm, I made a red-faced trip to WalMart at midnight to buy drinks in bulk to cope with the merciless Adirondack humidity, then, standing in line I made a Vitamin Water explode just by touching it (Wtf@#*^?) and if that weren't humiliating enough, I promptly began leaking breast milk through my tank top.

Your night sounded incredible!

Shelley said...

Never a dull moment with you girls. Since live vicariously through you, will you please remember to bring your camera to the next fabulous, star-studded gala.

:)

Kristin said...

Amanda - I've got some people I'd like to have you come by and explode... can we work something out?

Shelley - please, it's never going to happen... I'm a slacker.

SSC said...

Lucky girl!!!!

Anonymous said...

When and what channel can we watch the show?

Kristie said...

Hey were was the mamarazzi?

Sounds like you had a great time -sushi, sake, pie .. we're they handing out the viagra for women - sample packs ~lmao~

Should we tune in for the show?

I wanna hang out... I could pose as OC housewife in the making... hell bring me along and I'll snap the pictures ~smiles~