Friday, May 19, 2006

Why? Or, The Post Where I May Lose Some Readers

Can someone please explain this to me? Why does anyone really give a shit? Has marriage strictly between a man and a woman prevented the "decline of our country's moral fiber"? Are there less abusive marriages? More children raised in love and safety? Less adultery? Less alcoholism or drug abuse? More stable marriages?
No.

I don't think I need to point out that the number of women murdered by their spouses increases every year. I don't think I need to point out that children are being abused in record numbers and in the most insidious of manners. The divorce rate is now at 50%. I don't think I need to point out that our "Correct Marriages" have done jack shit to make us a better country.

Marriage is a difficult institution. The level of commitment needed to keep from walking away when things are feeling impossible is not a trait unique to heterosexuals.

Why would we, as a country, be so opposed to a loving union between two people? Are we terrified of giving gays tax breaks, legal responsibility for each other, or the respect that comes from being in a loyal union?

We are being wiretapped. Our children (mine) have been patted down in TSA security checks, our ports remain unsecured and we have reached STUPID LEVELS of death over in Iraq. However, as long as we keep those gays in their place we feel safer?

sigh.

& I swear, if one person comments that they "don't believe" in homosexuality, I will be forced to laugh out loud at you all day long. Belief is something you need for something you can't actually see... you can't NOT believe in something that actually exists. It is the moronic equivalent of, "I don't believe in Hummers." Just because you don't like them, doesn't mean they aren't on the road.

However, I would be interested in hearing actual reasons people may have for agreeing with the Senate. You can't sway me, but I appreciate a good argument.

**this is not a religious issue... this is not a desire for a religious union... this is about legality, not faith.

Think with love. See with your heart.

70 comments:

Anonymous said...

THANK YOU.

Tuesday Girl said...

I am 100% with you. I really don't know why people care SO MUCH abotu what other people do with their lives when it has nothing to do with them. I would rather my children be surrounded by and only grow up knowing loving people in committed relationships then men/women in loveless marriages, abusive relationships ect.

Melissa said...

I am so with you. ANd I will laught at the people who say otherwise too. I know a lot of people who deserve to be married, but our system does not believe in it. But they are married in my eyes anyway. The goverment needs to worry about other things. This issue needs to go away. No one should be able to say what makes a family or doesn't make a family.

ciodude said...

I guess I will be the first (the only?)to take a stance somewhat in opposition. I am not opposed to gay unions, but I am opposed to calling them marriages. I agree with point that marriage doesn't automatically make a heterosexual couple any better then when they were single. Divorce rates are high, spousal abuse is too frequent - no one with a brain can deny that. I would also agree there are gay unions that are more loving, more devoted and "better" then some of their heterosexual counterparts.

I think ultimately that marriage was defined and ordained by God. I haven't given it a lot of thought but I suppose I would rank civil unions, or marriages before a justice of the peace as different then a marriage performed in a church before a minister. Please note I didn't say below, worse or anything like that. Therefore by definition, (I quickly looked it up on-line: The legal union of a man and woman as husband and wife; The state of being married; wedlock ; A common-law marriage), two men or two women cannot be "married". This is a ridiculous analogy (sorry but it is Friday), but just because you have a pitcher of lemonade, doesn't mean you can suddenly change the definition and sell it to me as orange juice.

There are more important issues of the day, but I still don't like the idea of my marriage being diluted or cheapened by changing the definition.

jen said...

Amen. Anyone who is willing to make that kind of commitment with another person should have the right to do so.

Period.

Hed said...

It's so sad to me that this is such a problem. I remember the week that gay marriage was legal here in Oregon. I thought things were finally headed in the right direction.

And I do feel, in some ways, that this is nothing more than a distraction ploy aimed at people who might otherwise focus on the war.

It's really sad.

-H

Jenn said...

I totally aggree....and I DEFINITELY agree with H (Hed) Bush is coming up with trivial things to keep everyone's mind off Iraq.

Lisa S. said...

I am with ya sister!

crouching mother hidden diva said...

Marriage is hard, hard, hard. And although I am currently married to a man, I think my next marriage will definately be to a woman -- much, much easier!

crouching mother hidden diva said...

...and we can share clothes and shoes!

Undercover Angel said...

I agree with you 100%. I have lots of friends who are homosexual, and they have loving relationships like everybody else - if anything I think their relationships are a little bit more loving because they have to go through so much harrassment just to be together.

As per whether or not they should be allowed to marry - if two people love each other what difference should it make?

carrie said...

Kudos to you for sticking that limb out there! I wish we were in a place where this wouldn't even be a "hot" topic, unfortunately, we aren't. It is ridiculous.

I am going to go out on my own limb and say to comment #3: Your own marriage will only be "cheapened" if that is what YOU believe will happen. It is not like everything that happans to you is defined by someone else's experience. But, if that is what you believe, than that's okay. I don't have to agree.

Has anyone seen the Rosie O'Donnell Cruise documentary on HBO? Beautiful families having a great time and the freedom to do so without judgement! Except for the Bahamas portion, which was a sick reality.

Perrin said...

I agree with you. I just can't understand why some folks can't love and appreciate differences. Who cares what others do or who they want to marry. I simply cannot understand why some let their lives be led with fear rather than love.

melissa said...

I am a lurker, and this subject has "brought me out of the closet". I am so glad to see all of this support, why isn't it vocalized in every day society like this. People are so afraid that what I do with my girlfriend (of 16 years) might jeopardize them in some way. We don't force our life on anyone else, just like no one else forces their lives on us.

As for the marriage issue ... I would love to be able to marry my girlfriend. I would love to live in the same santity of marriage as everyone else. Why can't we redefine marriage as a union between two people that love one another.

There are so many people that rush off to Las Vegas to get married, right after they just meet. I think I have a long enough engagement to know that we are going to be together for the rest of our lives. Ours will not end in divorce, ours will not end in abuse, ours will end in side-by-side burial plots because we are going into eternity together.

I must thank all of you for your support, it makes me feel good that somewhere there are people that empathize with our situation. Note, I said empathize, not sympathize. We don't want any pity, or special treatment, we just would like the same priviledges as everyone else.

I would like to add, that we're not terrible people and we're not amoral. If you were to look into our lives, you would see we're exactly like you. We have our 3 kids, we have 2 granchildren, we have a mortgage, we have to pay insurance on everything and we are law abiding and most importantly tax payers. We are paying for these representitives that we elect to vote against priviledges that we should be privy to.

I will stop now ... but I just want to say thank you.

melissa said...

melissa again.

One thing I'd like to add that I think is pertinent to this blog and the people that read these blogs.

I am adopted, I am a lesbian. I didn't tell my adoptive mother that I was a lesbian until I was 19 years old. There was a lot of shock and a lot of denial.

I think its a good idea for all of you to dig deep in your souls and see if you're really this supportive, because there is every possibility your child will come to you with the same revelation.

Kevin Charnas said...

Kristin, thank you...that's all I can say...thank you.

abbynormal said...

I'm with you too. The "sanctity" of marriage argument just doesn't hold any weight when we see how lightly some "legal" heterosexuals take it.

Gracencameronsmomy said...

I totally agree. We were so proud of our Gavin Newsome when he allowed Gay marriage. And then it was taken away! those poor people...Why can't we just let people live their lives? How does this affect anyone? Now war, that affects people's lives...and yet, here we are...
Lisa

Sparky said...

I'm in total agreement with everything that you wrote.

Sparky
(who is relieved to live in Massachusetts where gay marriage is recognized....for now)

Margaret said...

Where were all of you when my state voted to change our state constitution to make gay union illegal? I was shocked then and I'm shocked now.

p.s. Kristin - I liked you before, but I like you even more now.

kathryn m. said...

I think ciodude just wants to call a gay marriage something other than "marriage"? I think a lot of people probably could come around to that way of thinking.

Great post Kristin.

EmmaK said...

Eva ...I agree with you. Gay marriage is the last thing anyone should be worried about, given the State of American politics at the moment.

ciodude ... You claim that 'God' said this, that and the other about marriage only being right between a man and a lady, but that my friend is a belief, and until you can show me empirical proof, I chose not to believe it.

InterstellarLass said...

Amen. Well said. Make marriage religious. Make 'unions' the legal things that happen down at the courthouse. Wouldn't that get people's panties in a twist?

LindaJ said...

You are not going to loose readers...and if you do, then they wern't worthy of reading your blog in the first place.
GREAT, GREAT post!!!

Jodi said...

HMMMMM. I actually have no idea where I stand on this issue. I really don't. I don't see how anybody else being married is going to cheapen my marriage. I know lots and lots of bad hetrosexual marriages and it doesn't cheapen mine. And I really don't care what other people do or what commitments they make to each other. I really really don't. I truly can't understand why people go soooo up in arms about the whole thing. I mean, how is it going to affect their llves really, on a daily basis? i don't get it.
I have other issues, but I'll leave it at that. Let everybody who wants to get married get married, I truly don't get the hubbabulu.

Stephanie A. said...

Sing it, Kristin!

I was just having a conversation with a gay man today about his current struggles for rights. The thing that struck me was his positivity, though. How he could laugh at the end of our conversation was beyond me.

And Melissa hit a good point about how, as gay people, they are paying taxes and the lives they have are not allowed to be like everyone else's. Frankly, it's sickening to think that in such a relatively enlightened time that we treat people like that.

carrie said...

I was married at a Golf and Country Club by a . . . JUDGE!! I am going to hell, I guess. Whatever. Thank you Kristin, for allowing me to vent.

Mega Mom said...

I have a feeling that you and I might have some different opinions on things, but this isn't one of them. I came out of church a few weeks ago to see a petition about keeping marriage between a man and a woman and I had to walk by shaking my head.

I'm so proud of all of the diversity that we have in our country and I think gay, multicultural, and multiracial (and any other "different") marriages are something to be celebrated, not condemned.

ANA NYC said...

Why is it so easy to get married and difficult to get divorced? Shouldn't it be the other way around? Wouldn't that prevent alot of divorces?

I don't know if any readers are divorced or have experienced living through one with someone close to you but they can be really nasty. And if there's kids involved it's even worse.

Perhaps if couples were required to go through some type of compatibility classes, or therapy, or just pain old live together first to see if they can commit for "the rest of their lives" then mabye this would reduce the number of failed marriages.

Isn't a marriage about the commitment and the love for one another? Why is that limited to just heterosexuals? If two people have the right intentions and fully understand what it's all about to be married then anyone should have the privilege.

Holly said...

Standing ovation to you Kristin!
This is also one of my soapbox items as well!!!
Love is all that truly matters in this world. Judgmentalism is hate.
I could write pages on how I feel regarding this subject, but you summed it up perfectly.

I helped to raise a gay child (my stepdaughter) and believe me, it's NOT a choice like the fundemental religious right preaches. Being gay is NOT a walk in the park in our society and climate. It takes a lot of fortitude and bravery to stand up and be who you really are. I honor all those who can do it!

And I am totally with Melissa (who is a friend of mine) keep your hearts open. You never know when you will be faced with this issue as well. It doesn't just happen to other people.....

Peace!

Kevin Charnas said...

Okay, I'm back...I couldn't stay away. I want to commend ciodude on using his deductive reasoning skills to come to the argument in favor of gay-unions for obvious reasons. And although back in the civil rights' days, we eventually found out that "Separate but Equal" didn't hold validity for long, it did eventually lead to something bigger and better. So, as long as me and my family have the same rights as everyone else, I don't care. Call it "Butt-Fuckers Are Us Unions" - I really don't give a shit.

However, after that, the validity of his argument goes right down the shitter.
No one truly KNOWS what god wants. Not really. No one has a monopoly on god and is actually delusional for thinking so. The Bible, The Koran, The Old Testament, ancient Hindi or Buddhist texts - no religious document was faxed down, sent down, emailed, nothing. Sorry, it wasn't. I certainly believe that they have their place in a constructed society. And should be held as great teachings from truly enlightened people. Taught as metaphors and life lessons about living in harmony, love, compassion and TOLERANCE.
I'm a poet and often feel like my poetry has come from another place other than myself. Something much larger than all of us, but yet something that we're all apart of - all limbs on the same body. But I would NEVER be so arrogant to say that this is the word of god. As far as we know, god has 'SANCTIONED' nothing, except life. And by the frivilous way in which many treat it,(George W) we give no sanctity to it.

And also, his poor argument of comparing lemonade with orange juice; one has no bearing on the other - they both serve as sustenance, both drink to cure parched lips and thirst. And because I drink lemonade, this should have no bearing on his orange juice, unless he's not that comfortable with orange juice. But, that really has no bearing on my lemonade...unless I'm not allowed lemonade, then I'm going to be pissed.

Holly said...

High-five, Kevin!
Well said ~

Lisa and Tate said...

Totally agree with you Kristin.... but have not more to add to what others have said....

Lisa

Nikki said...

Let me be honest here. About 13 years ago I would have thought you were all crazy.

Living in small town America, I only knew 3 gay people and there was only one that I liked until I found out she was gay - after she came out of the closet - I avoided her like the plague.

The only thing I knew about "GAY" was that she might want to kiss me. Really it's true. I was afraid she was going to make a pass at me. That SCARED me. I didn't care that she may want to kiss other girls BUT NOT ME.

Looking back, I could just kick my own ass. How CONCEITED was I to have thought that? It makes me feel ashamed of myself. I really liked her and I lost a really good friend due to my stupid FEAR.

The general attitude of small town AMERICA is that "GAY" is bad. You should not talk about it because (living in the bible belt) you might get your ass stomped. The only way you could not get your ass stomped is if you were slandering gay people - THEN it was okay, and because that was the only thing that was allowed to be spoken out loud, that's the only side of the story I ever heard - until I left small town America and learned more about people and values. My values, and the values that this country was built upon.

Kevin said it best when he said TOLERANCE. There is also FREEDOM and LIBERTY. This country was started as a place where everyone who was persecuted could go, be free, and live in peace. What has happened to that? What has happened to us?

Ours is one of the few countries in the world where we are all given an education, but we are still ignorant. I was ignorant.

It turns out that my cousin is gay. She has lived with her partner for 10 years or more. Their partnership is much, much more stable than most hetero partnerships I have run across. They love and support each other. They have 3 children, a house, 2 cars and have the biggest balls ever because they still live in small town America.

Do you want to know what is really great? Small town America helped them when my cousin was diagnosed with a rare and extremely deadly form of cancer. They helped with bills and the kids and the house – everything. THAT IS BEAUTIFUL. It amazes me. It shows we can change from judgemental assholes into loving and caring individuals.

I’m not going to debate on the bible. I know what is says about marriage. It also says LOVE THY NEIGHBOR.

Homosexual marriage. Bring it on. It is long over due. The fact that anyone is gay doesn’t matter. The fact that they want to get married shouldn’t matter. What matters is how we treat those around us gay or otherwise…and to vote those sorry asses out of office who keep this illegal. The fact that homosexuals get married is not going to cheapen my marriage a damn bit and you’re in a sorry state of mind if you think so. To me, it would appear that you don’t think to much of your marriage.

(Sorry to be such a space hog)

Kristin said...

These comments do me a world of good... I was just so bummed yesterday thinking about our country getting hung up on the most banal of situations... to think of anyone, in this day and age, being prohibited from anything because of who they love leaves me cold and scared. ... thank you to all of you for not only helping me regain my footing, but for speaking with such honesty and courage and love.

kim said...

When my 10 yr old came home suddenly announcing that Ellen de Generes was a lesbian and that Will and Grace was about gay guys and he had suddenly developed an overwhelming interest in the subject, I knew I was going to have to come up with something profound and take a stance that could simplify it for him as well as help put it in perspective. This is what I said and what I believe whole heartedly.

There are ignorant, scared, narrow minded people every where you go. Every day you make a choice whether to be like them or to stand up for what is right, what you were taught and what you believe. This will shape you as a person and as a man. Every human being has worth, it doesn't matter if they are gay or straight, black or yellow or white, what you judge a person on isn't what they look like or who they have chosen to sleep with or spend their life with. You judge a person on their simple acts of kindness, if they keep their word, if you can count on them to be a friend when you need one the most. You judge a person on how they act when no one is looking. When they choose a difficult path alone because they believe its right. Even if it would easier not to speak out and stand in a crowd un-noticed.

Even if you lost a few narrow minded readers Kristin... you gain respect from people who matter more. People who believe in the freedom to love who they want, people with compassion and loyalty regardless of another human beings gender.

Nikki said...

Kim, that was so well put. Bravo.

denise said...

no arguments here, Ive been with the father of my kids for 16 years and refuse TO marry because "In the name of god and the state (?) I now pronounce you married." whos business it is of theres? why do they get to decide who gets married? why the hell do they care?? I dont get it. and if people stopped readin' your wonderfullness for this post then you probably didnt want them readin' it anyway. also I soooo agree w/crouching mother!

Kim M. said...

I totally agree! What's the problem I still don't get it?? Love is love. Don't people deserve to be with the person they love??

Mrs. Chicky said...

This is a tough topic to tackle. Coming from a state that does allow gay marriage I can tell you that gay marriage still does not guarantee equality but its a step in the right direction.

Kristi said...

Great post! I wanted to add something to the dialogue. The government has no business trying to impose morality on people. I say this as a Christian because this is a 2 way street. The government doesn't have the right to prevent consenting adults from marrying each other, but it also doesn't have the right govern what I teach my children about sexuality. In other words, tax funded public schools should not impose a pro-gay stance by allowing teachers to tell 2nd graders gay themed fairy tales (see link). If we're going to respect the rights of gays, we need to also respect the rights of parents to retain their religious beliefs and teach them to their children.

On another note, if government has no authority to ban gays from marrying, should consentual polygymous marriages be legalized? What's the difference if everyone is of age and consents to be married? (I'm married to only one man, by the way...just playing devil's advocate)

Sorry for the long comment. I couldn't resist. :)


http://news.yahoo.com/s/nm/20060425/pl_nm/rights_gays_massachusetts_dc

melissa said...

melissa again ...

the lesbian one, not the PAP.

Speaking as a gay person, I agree with Kristi in the last post. I agree that in schools have no right to teach about gays. They do have an obligation to teach about tolerance and to not judge people for who they are, what they look like or the color of their skin. This prevents bullying.

I am NOT for shoving this down peoples throats, including children. However, I DO believe that this is something that needs to be open dialog in the home. It allows a potentially gay child to stay close with their family and to not have a war when the truth finally comes out.

She also mentioned about polygamy. I wouldn't equate this issue to polygamy the same way I wouldn't equate this to heterosexuality. Its just another lifestyle. And in America, we have the FREEDOM to choose our religion, the RIGHT to bear arms, and the PRIVILEDGE to be with who we want.

Thank you Kristin for this for topic and the forum to speak it in.

Kristin said...

Ok, I will address the polygamy thing first...

Polygamy, as it exists on the fringes of our soceity today, victimizes children. When pre-teen boys are abandoned on the streets and when pre-teen girls are married off to men more than twice their age, that isn't an issue of freedom, that is a crime.

Now, re: schools and sex ed. Sexual education in the schools should be about health and biology. Love and relationship information should come from the home.

Tolerance and compassion should be taught everywhere.

Personally, I don't have a problem with the "Susie has 2 Mommies" stories because these families make up a very real place in our soceity.

(I haven't read Kristi's link yet, so I can't speak to the specific article she references...)

So, there you go...my 2 cents, again.

eastcoastermomma said...

Well said, Kristin! I also totally agree with your argument about the validity of polygamy.

sunshine scribe said...

So not only did you NOT loose me as a reader but I am linking to you TODAY. I loved this post. Every word. I am standing here clapping loudly because of your bravery to tackle such an important topic.

For me it is like questioning women's right to vote or the decision to abolish slavery. I am proud to live in a country where we do honour same sex marriage and I just hope our current Prime Minister doesn't mess it up by trying to take it away...

Recovering Wino said...

Anyone who opposes gay marriage is incredibly narrow minded. Likewise, I get pretty ticked when I read about states that prohibit adoption because of sexual orientation...like Florida.

Mel said...

The definitions of marriage from http://wordnet.princeton.edu/perl/webwn?s=marriage :

"marriage, matrimony, union, spousal relationship, wedlock (the state of being a married couple voluntarily joined for life (or until divorce)) "a long and happy marriage"; "God bless this union"

S: (n) marriage, married couple, man and wife (two people who are married to each other) "his second marriage was happier than the first"; "a married couple without love"

S: (n) marriage, wedding, marriage ceremony (the act of marrying; the nuptial ceremony) "their marriage was conducted in the chapel"

S: (n) marriage (a close and intimate union) "the marriage of music and dance"; "a marriage of ideas"

A marriage is merely bringing two things or people together in a union. And just because when the laws were written they didn't think this social scenario would come to pass doesn't negate the true definition.
And it is shameful to me, shameful, that my brother cannot marry his partner, who loves and cares for him and his children from a previous marriage, because of a hysterical and specious line of reasoning that has no place in our modern society.

Becky said...

i was raised in church my whole life and of course was taught how terrible being gay was. personally, i dont care either way. if my children were gay i'd be ok with that. i dont agree with bashing homosexuals and if they wanna get married, let them.

socialworker/frustrated mom said...

I am with ya too.

Mama C-ta said...

PERFECT.

Angry Dad said...

Wow, so many comments. Me, I'm with you all the way, and everything you wrote rings true in my ears.

texas math said...

I have no idea why gay marriage is illegal. The basis for it is more of a religious one...and quite frankly that baffles me since our country was founded on the idea of the separation of church and state.

I have faith that in time the Supreme Court will eventually pave the way for legalized marriages, because of what I have just mentioned.

On the other hand, I think both sides of this debate are blowing this out of proportion. Marriage is basically a joke nowadays. There is a certain sanctity in marriage but that is being dissolved by the Hollywood marriages and the marriages of convience just to name a couple. I really don't know why people choose to defend the sanctity of marriage as a union between a man and a woman when it doesn't work and at the same time I don't know why people would want to get married when the statistics show it leads to divorce over half the time.

lildb said...

Thanks for a really well-articulated post on such a red herring issue. I just -- *shakes head sorrowfully* -- gah. It makes me feel so gross to think that we are wasting precious time on something that will eventually be the norm - the old folks can't stomach the idea of change, but statistics show that approx. 2/3 of the citizenry of this country agree that everyone should be entitled to living their lives as they choose. Meanwhile, there's a pointless war that takes more lives daily, not to mention the INSANE gobs of the taxpayers' money, and WHY are we there? It's such _nonsense_. Urgh. My grandkids' grandkids will be paying for our current government's mistakes.

It makes my stomach ache. I'm getting ulcers from the bizarre nightmare that is this administration.

Again, Kristin, thanks for this post. Needs to be said. Many, many times.

rubyiscoming said...

Ok, really, I'm officially the President of your Fan Club. No. Seriously. I share your brain. Not only "ditto what you said" but I live in the buckle of the Bible Belt and even as morally superior as everyone "thinks" they are here, our divorce rate is.....yup....71%. Ouch.

By the way, if we use the term "legal" when it comes to the definition of what "marriage" is, then why bring up God? What does God have to do with it if marriage is a "legal union" by definition? Besides, if allowing those who love and cherish one another who only want to share their lives (and maybe get some medical insurance and a right to share in decisions with their spouse), what FREAKING DIFFERENCE does it make in my life or yours? There is no purity of definition in the word marriage - heterosexuals ruined it a L-O-N-G time ago (and I'm married very happily!).

I'm going to a wedding of a couple that I've known for years in late July (they are getting married in Canada). When I think of marriages that I hope to be after hitting 15 years together, I hope that Joel and I can have a similar marriage - they (two gay males) have a remarkable partnership full of love, honor, trust and humour.

You keep speaking da truth, sistah - I'll keep making Kristin for President bumper stickers for all my Bible belt friends here! (grin)

rubyiscoming said...

Yes, I live in Florida - for 13 more months and counting (and I'm a native!!!)

Kristin said...

Once again, I cannot express how wonderful it has been to read these comments... the clarity and sanity and logic that has been displayed here is a message we need to continue to share.

Thank You!!!!

Mom101 said...

AMEN!!!!!!!!!

(Is that enough exclamation points? Just in case, here are a few more...)

!!!!!!!

Oh, The Joys said...

I live in Georgia and am GLAD the judge struck it down. May it stay down. I think it is all motivated by ignorance and fear. I agree with your post and many of your commenters. What is "Christian" about hate? I don't get it.

karen! said...

Wow! Look at all your comments!
I think there should be a way for gay couples to be legally unioned. Call it something else, if you must. But they should be able to share health benefits like married people and be able to file their taxes together, and buy cars and houses together, well, they can probably do that last thing. Oh, and adopt kids together too. If it is a loving home environment, that would be better than jumping from foster home to foster home or whatever.

I know my husband has a different opinion on this. He is totally against it, but it is pointless to argue with him. What would it prove to argue with him anyway. He has no real say, he doesn't get to decide anything. So let him think what he wants.

B.J. said...

thank you thank you thank you thank you!

sunshine scribe said...

This really does deserve to be recognized as a "perfect post" the 60+ comments speak for themselves.

You rock

MommaK said...

Amazing & brilliant post! The comments deserve an award too.

Congrats on yours today :)

mama_tulip said...

Here via Sunshine Scribe -- excellent post. No doubt a Perfect Post.

Meredith said...

I sure hope that in our lifetimes we will look back on this and wonder how it was EVER an issue. While it's not the same, there are far fewer issues with inter-racial marriage now than in the past. I can't imagine the government throwing a hissy fit over inter-racial marriages now. I have faith that we will reach that attitude and comfort and obvious DUH-ness with gay marriage. Marriage is a union of love. The idea of gay marriage cheapening the marriage of a hetero couple is absurd. The more we open our hearts and minds the bigger we are as people.

So well said.

Suburban Turmoil said...

Well said. And oy, the comments! :)

Congrats on a Perfect Post.

J.D. said...

Kristin, the only reason I might stop reading you is because now you have a post with 66 comments which is exactly double my record. But that's the ONLY reason I'd hate on ya :)

Mommy off the Record said...

I just came over here from Sunshine Scribe's blog. Congrats on the PP award!

I think that we will see some major changes on this issue in the next 20 years. I feel that people in their 20s and 30s, who are having kids now, are much more accepting of gay marriage and therefore their children will be and when they get to voting age, we'll see some change. At least, I hope.

kittenpie said...

I totally agree - just because someone is doing something different than you, it doesn't make your thing less valid and it doesn't hurt you. It's not about religion, it's not about morals, it's about two consenting adults' right to love someone and express it in the same way that other people do. Hell, love and marriage are difficult. We should praise, reward, and support those who are willing to try and be a solid partner and support for someone else. This is another reason why I am proud to be canadian, where this freedom has now been given. I just hope with every fibre of my being that our current conservative government doesn't try to mess with it, since our new PM is a bit of a right-wing turkey.

something blue said...

I completely agree and accept gay and lesbian marriages. Yet I get so angry with myself when I find that I still need to rewire my brain.

When I started a new job, I found out that one of my coworkers had recently gotten married. After congratulating her I asked about her husband. It never occurred to me that she is a lesbian. I felt so embarrassed and ashamed that I had made such a faux pas. I learned my lesson and thank goodness she was able to correct me and understand my slip-up. I swoon with admiration at their marriage. I believe they share a deeper connection than many of the other married couples that I’ve known. Of course they are somewhat newly weds. You got to love the honeymoon phase!

I truly hope that there will be more acceptance in the marriage of All loving couples.

Congrats on your much deserved award!

~d said...

Amazing. Well said. I am glad, glad Kevin saw it fit to send 'us' over to read this.
~d