Wednesday, September 17, 2008

Shuts. It. Down.

Mistake number 1 would be watching the Rachel Zoe Project on Bravo.

Mistake number 2 would be liking Taylor, the control freak rather bitchy assistant.

Mistake number 3 would be knowing that I won't be able to control myself from saying, "kills it", "I die" and "bananas". They're too excellent/lame to pass up...

Mistake number 4 would be sadly realizing that HELLO. I own the "Rachel Zoe" look and now I want to smack her for considering it hers... giant sunglasses, maxi dresses, unbrushed hair? Peasant blouse multiple bangles and chunky rings? All me, from, let's see, I started walking and dressing about 38 years ago, so yeah, Kristin Fast, working Rachel Zoe since 1970 (except for the sunglasses, my mother thought they looked goofy on a toddler).

Mistake number 5 would be accepting that I love this terrible show, weird Valley accents and all... and I bet Rachel knows it. It's her "witch-vibe".

18 comments:

Marisa said...

It's BANANAS I tell you, BANANAS.

Joe said...

Between this post and the one on the Tudors, it's become clear that I'm not watching enough television. I really need to make a "Kristin list" just to catch up on all of the things I've been missing.

Jill said...

I haven't watched yet, but now I think I might have to. Let's see Psych ended last week, so I even have an open slot! Time to set the DVR!

Kristin said...

Marisa - You watched!

Joe - There is a very specific cocktail necessary to maximize trash tv viewing... I'll share: insomnia + DVR = AWESOME!

Jill - I know, it's just in time to fill the void. Also, season finale of Psych was a bit weak, no? It's my boys favorite show and it left them very "meh".

furiousBall said...

I am so glad I have no idea what any of that meant.

gorillabuns said...

she had me at "shut-up!"

amanda said...

I cycle through most of these thoughts as I watch that show. Reality tv that makes me question whether or not I should be embarrassed for watching it is my favorite indulgence.

Los said...

I'm nearly 100% sure that my wife not only knows about this show, but DVRs it ... sigh.

Kristie said...

Goes to set the TIVO so I can see Kristin in her very own prime time spot... oh okay, you say it's not prime time... that's okay, I'll tune in anyways

Thanks for drawing on my wall. Now if i could only find my password again, I'd actually see the writing on the wall.

Joannah said...

I saw lots of promos for that show yesterday while I watched three hours of Tabatha's Salon Takeover. But, I forced myself to change the channel after that. I really do hate reality tv shows, but I find them so easy to watch. Ugh!

Kristin said...

Van - You killed it. You. Kill. It.

GB - She does have a rather special inflection, no?

Amanda - As do I... I think I'm such a loser and then realize that everyone I know is secretly watching.

Los - If she starts referring to her sunglasses as "Sunnies", you may want to call for backup.

Kristie - Must have been some other Kristin as I have yet to master the art of wall drawing... I can, however, poke the hell out of you!

Joannah - I haven't succumbed to Tabatha yet, but that's mostly because I find her a little scary.

Anonymous said...

Did you know Rachel Zoe claims to be only 37?

I say - BULLSHIT! Those lines around her mouth make her look like my granny.

Rach said...

Whoa girl, have you ever watched "The Coupling" on the BBC network...very sassy:)

Anonymous said...

I love your blog. You swing from topic to topic but always with "your" voice.

Do you talk the way you write? Just curious.

Kristin said...

Anon - I knew she copped to "late 30s" but I thought she was closer to my age (39)... she must have been a smoker!

Rach - No, I haven't caught it... but now it clearly must join the looong list of things-i-view.

Anon - I think, in real life, I speak a bit more concisely. Maybe. I do know that I have a very bad habit of calling people and beginning the conversation in the middle... for example, they will say, "Hello?" and I will say,"So, Thursday? Yes or no to the green shirt?". Which is, you know, a little confounding and a lot annoying.

Anonymous said...

OH MY GOSH...just watched it last night on my tivo. Hated "Tay" and thought she was so mean to the poor guy from Vogue - Brad? Don't remember. Anyhoo, we'll debrief this weekend!

And to anon - she's so not in her 30's, though she did mention having kids! I think she partied hard in the 90s with more than ciggies...
--Becky

Kristin said...

Bex - Can I call you Becky, Home Ec-y?

HAHHAHAAHA!

Gen said...

Shu-ut u-up!

I watched that damn show for the first time this past weekend.

The valley accent is killing me - it is so bananas - i'd like totally die if I talked like that.

I'd die.