Friday, March 07, 2008

If X1=Y2, Then What Is Your Favorite Word?

So in my eternal quest to find something to occupy my time until my little ungrateful children return home from school bring more personal meaning and fulfillment to my life, I met with a counselor of sorts for "Women In Transition".  Which sounds a lot like a counselor for women recently released from prison or who have escaped an abusive marriage and not for women who just haven't really ever had a job and are realizing that they are actually not qualified for any sort of job and aren't all that interested in competing with the newly university degree-ed for the jobs they are not qualified for... but, apparently it is exactly for losers women like me.

One of the jumping off points for this process, after a rather lengthy Q & A session during which she asked things like, "Have you ever met someone and thought, 'I really admire her & I would love to have a career like hers!'?"  And I was all, "Oh, absolutely!" and she asked, "Who?" and I was like, "Nancy Drew!" And she looked annoyed and then I realized that I haven't actually met Nancy Drew.

So I laughed like, of course I am joking! and said, well, um no... although most of my friends are working, I don't particularly see myself doing what they do, but I would like to have the same satisfaction I see in them... blah-blah-blah

I have been sent home with a 600 6 page personality quiz and I am not to think too much about the answers but rather answer with my first instinct... and all of this sounds easy enough but I am finding the whole process rather confusing.

For example, the question: At parties, do you, A) Sometimes get bored or B) Always have fun?

Where is answer C?  C would be the following answer: If it's a party of people I like I will have fun, if it is something weird that I have been forced out of obligation to attend I will probably be bored, but will paste a smile on my face and therefore will appear to be having fun.

or

When playing cards, do you enjoy most:  A) the sociability or B) the excitement of winning or C) the problem of getting the most out of each hand or D) don't you enjoy playing cards?

I am looking for answer E which reads:  cannot answer because other than Old Maid & Go Fish you haven't ever played a game of cards in your life.

Then there is "Which word appeals to you more?" section and as I prefer "mercy" over "justice" and "peacemaker" over "judge" and "forgive" over "tolerate", I am clearly the ideal person for that "Head of Unicorns and Rainbows" job opening.

At this point my head is beginning to explode and I feel not unlike a stranger in a strange land, however, the strange land in this case is my brain.

We meet again on Tuesday at which time I fully expect to be the first person to fail due to lack of awareness of her own personality.





27 comments:

Jennifer (Jen on the Edge) said...

When you figure out what you want to be when you grow up, please let me know, as I have no clue myself and need all the help I can get.

Ava's family said...

Yep, I'd have trouble with that party question. They really need a C. How can they NOT have a C? Good luck on the test! =)

kitchu said...

Can I give you my career? Cuz I don't want it. I want counseling for transitioning OUT of the workforce. I am certain I can find all kinds of satisfaction being a stay at home person (SAHP, or sap, for short).

Amy Y said...

You aren't alone, Mama. I don't know what I want to be when I grow up either.

Kristin said...

The biggest problem is I don't want a job per se... I just want something other than volunteer work to do... I'll figure it out eventually!

Mel said...

Girl, teach yourself data entry. You already know how to type and spell well; now learn your ten-key pad (the number pad on the right side of your keyboard). Just grab the Yellow Pages and start typing phone numbers into a Wordpad doc. Keep your middle finger hovering over the five, which you can recognize by touch because it has a bump on it.
There are a million times a trillion part-time data entry jobs out there, one of which will fit the hours you want to fill. And many pay higher than minimum wage.

Anonymous said...

Folks, I am here to tell you that Kristin does not need a job for money, she needs a job because she is bored.

Kristin said...

Um, Anonymous, that's not exactly true. It's not about money or about being bored... it's about a little more than that, but thanks for breaking it down to small words.

Daniella said...

Anon it's an idiot.
Sorry had to write that.
I so know what your talking about. I just recently became a volunteer with our Local M@ADD chapter and I'm really enjoying it - especially since so far it's not kept me in an office and I can do it when I want. I'm doing my first DUI stop next month the Sheriff's - Have a good weekend.

Daniella said...

I meant ANON IS an idiot.

There I got to type it twice

Kayce said...

Right there with you Kristin...I'm still trying to figure out how to manage life after work.

Anonymous said...

I think Nancy Drew was a perfectly acceptible answer.

It is hard to find something that feels fulfilling and yet doesn't take up too much time so that it makes it difficult to participate in the parts of your life that you really do enjoy.

Really helpful, I know.

Pink Evita said...

Write girl Write, I love reading what you write. I have no idea how to exactly make that a living, ugh, if I did I might try it myself but anyway just a word of encouragement if you are thinking of a book or articles for magazines.

Kristin said...

Right now my biggest concern is not being committed after turning in this "evaluation"... I don't want anything I've answered to shout, "UNFIT! UNFIT!"

Joannah said...

I had those types of questionnaires. I'm not an either/or type of person.

How would you like to be my personal assistant? I need someone to research termite treatments for my pest infested abode.

;-)

Kristin said...

Joannah - I had a girlfriend once mention that she thinks all the termites in Laguna are holding hands and keeping our houses up!

The Domesticator said...

I know where you are coming from.

Totally.

dgm said...

So this thing you are searching for--does it have to be a paying gig or no? Have you looked into the CASA program (court ordered special advocates)? They are the voices for foster kids whose rights are at issue in court. The state has its advocates, the foster and birth parents have theirs, but no one represents the kids, and their interests are most at stake. You don't have to be a lawyer; CASA has its own training program. Basically you commit to X number of hours (not a lot, and I think there's flexibility in when you meet with your kid) for 18 months. You don't adopt the kid or anything, just befriend them and look out for them when everyone else squabbles about their own interests.

If not that, there's something out there. It sounds like you are best with matters requiring empathy. Don't worry about answering "correctly" or how you want yourself to look. If you answer truthfully, they'll be better able to find what's right for you.

carrie said...

My brain exploded just reading about your experience.

I hope you aren't paying for this service, because if you are, than you could just fire this lady and we could all take a girls' weekend in Cabo . . . or something, and figure it all out! :)

Shelley said...

Okay, I don't know who invented those tests but, having endured many of them in the past couple of decades, I have come to the conclusion they should be shot. You don't need these tests or this woman.

I'm with Perrin. Write! You are an incredibly talented journalist/writer who brings much enjoyment to your readers ...and to yourself. You have a rare gift.

So don't waste one more minute on these "Rorschach wanna-be" tests. And go for it already.

Sheesh!

Shelley said...

...and then let's go have lunch. :D

Pollyanna said...

I took that same EXACT personality test in a "displaced homemakers" program that I enrolled in at community college 4 years ago. When it came back the counselor just looked at it and said I was a complete freak. (okay, she didn't SAY that but I could see it on her face). I am such a contradiction, I am very bubbly and friendly but don't really enjoy people. I get bored easily but hate surprises. I don't like being told what to do, yet crave predictiblity and structure. You get the idea! :) She had no clue what I should do for work. I was like, well thanks for nothing lady. Anyway, I hope your personality test turns out better than mine did and that you can find your dream career. I still have no clue what my dream career is. *sigh*

Pollyanna said...

OH OH OH OH I like the CASA program idea. You would rock at that and I would imagine that it would be VERY fulfilling.

And that ANON is an IDIOT. After being a SAHM for years going out in the workforce has so much more to it than just money and boredom. It has to do with finding out who you are once you take away the fact that you are a wife and mother first and foremost. It's very easy to get completely lost in the most important job in life, motherhood, and lose sight of who YOU are as a person. I totally get that, trust me. Have you thought about going back to school?

Kristin said...

Jodi - YES!!!! I am so similar... and that is what kept jumping out at me as I answered the questions - I am a mass of contradictions.

Gen said...

I have done the CASA program and yes it is fulfilling and I am seriously considering getting back into it out here. BUT it will tug at your heart in a very big way - a lot of the cases aren't exactly for the tender hearted.

Oh and it's volunteer work unless you are a coordinator - so I thought that you were looking for something other than that.

Let me know if you go that route and I can fill you in on the good and the bad.

Good luck - I am looking too :)

Los said...

Wait till the counselor starts doing the ink blot tests and asking you what you see ... that'll be fun.

I absolutely agree with the party answer you gave. If it's people I know and am friends with, I'll have a good time. I'll try to have a good time with strangers, but that is by no means guaranteed.

Kristin said...

I have a good friend who went through the CASA program - I am really impressed with what they do and accomplish and think this is a great suggestion... I may have to harden my heart a little, though and I am not sure if I'm able to do so... I will definitely look into the program and see if they host an informational seminar... even if I find an actual "job", I'd like to be a part of such a great organization.