Monday, July 17, 2006

Painfully Dull

Yes, there is a deleted post and No, I don't have new information and Yes, I will share as soon as I can and let you all collectively scratch your heads and wonder, "What was the big friggin' deal about that?". I am not trying to be the Queen of Secrets, but part of the deal isn't mine to talk about and since I am not sure what, if any place I have in this, I am keeping mum.

Now, moving on or, more accurately, moving out. Did you people know that when one replaces all the floors and paints all the walls, one must remove everything from said floors and walls first? Yes. I didn't know either.

I suppose I thought that some kind and benevolent furniture fairy came in and held sofas and end tables aloft whilst busy installation elves laid beauteous teak beneath... clearly, I need a reality check.

We have had to hire a moving company to haul our belongings away and into short term storage... and it isn't so much the big items such as books or artwork that cause us grief, it is the eleventy billion items of flotsam and jetsam, otherwise know as crap-which-must-now-be-dealt-with... AWESOME!

I am tempted to bitch slap the children's teachers... what is it with all the ultra presh-us artwork and poems? How am I supposed to part with any of this, and by the same token, how the hell am I expected to keep it all? There is just so. damn. much.

Also, if you have a smallish space in say, your bathroom, and you need to install a window lickety-split because you haven't had a window in there for 5 years and it tends to get, shall we say, a little eggy at times, but an odd size window will take anywhere from 6 - 8 weeks to fabricate and you are in a bit of a rush, well, go ahead and order a marine grade port-hole and own the Spongebob vibe.

The best part of all this, other than the unseasonably warm 90+ degree weather, is the fact that it must be done by Friday because we leave on Saturday for Hawaii. For a month. Stress? I hardly know you. HA!

Now, before you all get, "Hawaii for a month... the cow!" on me, let me point out that this means I am leaving a great deal of the remodel - the paint, the flooring and the tiling of the master bath (aka, The Mermaid Grotto) to the "good sense" of my contractor. Who is the patron saint of renovation because I am pretty much thinking that I have some candles to light.

I throw up a little in my mouth just thinking of all of that work happening without my constant and oh-so-helpful supervision.

But, I am really, really looking forward to Hawaii.

Let me just add that my mom lives in Hawaii, as well as a billion other relatives, so it is more than just R & R... it's the yearly family pilgrimage. Also, my mother's boyfriend is Chinese and we feel that for Eva, this time spent with him and our extended family is a natural way for her to be a part of her birth culture.

Me again... Hugh is here for 10 days before he comes over so he will be able to supervise the floor and painting... but, not really because he is at work during the day... so, my Mother in Law is on task!

40 comments:

Jenny said...

Ok, I totally don't get the first part of this post but I'm dying with curiousity.

And envy..about Hawaiia. Sigh...take me with you!

jennster said...

a whole fucking MONTH?!?!! good lord, that's LONG! have a great time... i'd go stir crazy for that long. lol

Shelley said...

I know what you mean about the mountains of cute kiddie creations you now have to deal with. I just spent 3 days cleaning my office out - most of the clutter due to G's and C's arts and crafts. Ugh! And the fact most of them are oversized doesn't help.

On the other hand, you'll have plenty of opportunity to unwind in Hawaii.

(grumble) Take me with you! :)

Shell

Lisa and Tate said...

Hawaii for a month??? UNBELIEVABLE.... very jealous but happy for you... You will have to make it up by posting pictures and stories!!

Lisa

Margaret said...

This is the first and only time in my life I will ever say this. Going to Hawaii is kind of sucky. Seriously, I would have a hell of a time trusting a contractor and reliquishing so much control. Especially after the tile incident.

Kevin Charnas said...

i can't believe that you're going to Hawaii for a whole month without me...
you.are.so.mean.to.me.

Kevin Charnas said...

and actually, Margaret's right, I'd be crawling out of my skin leaving it up to the contractor. I'd be kicking serious ass upon my return if they fucked stuff up.

Holly said...

I see lots of fruity drinks with little umbrellas in your future.....

Melissa said...

I wanted a benevolent furniture fairy when we re-did our floors. What I got was this Pod thingy in my driveway, that hubby and my brothers had to move all our shit into. It was neat, I even deorated it for Christmas.

I am J.E.A.L.O.U.S. about hawaii, but in a good way. I hope you have a blast.

Heather said...

Little green me wishes you smooth furniture fairies, trustworthy and able contractors, and lots of fruity drinks in Hawaii. We're our own contractors (sadly) and have so much to do to our tiny (Under 1000 square feet. Seriously.) digs.

mothergoosemouse said...

You WILL be blogging from Hawaii, yes? YES?!?

Please ask someone to check in with your contractor and come by your house and monitor status. Please. I'm sure your contractor is fabulous, but still.

Oh, The Joys said...

Could NOT leave the contractor - what if he f's up the frothy, white, cake icing tiles? ANGST!

mollymcmommy said...

oh hawaii......oh, oh, oh i'm so jealous! :)

post some pictures if you can to further my jealousy? i love landscapes of hawaii

do the kids need some playmates to keep them busy? cause i do offer mine, no trouble at all. course i do have to come....

m

Joannah said...

Have a wondeful time in Hawaii. Drink a Mai Tai for me! ;-)

Nikki said...

Hawaii?

You have family there huh.

You still suck <---- me green with envy.

J's Mommy said...

oooooo Hawaii! Haven't been and would love to go. Take lots of pics and please post them.

Mrs. Chicky said...

I don't envy you all with all that remodeling... but Hawaii? For a month? Something tells me you'll find something that will help you relax a bit.

Lisa Goldstein/Kelly Kelly said...

you can practice your zen on the beaches of hawaii as you try not to hink of your house in the hands of another. but do light those candles. cover all your bases.

And have an amazing time.

Lisa

lildb said...

just tell me you'll still be participating in le blog while you're in Hawaii, and you may leave, with my blessing. :p

oh, and the nail-biting issue of the mermaid grotto, sans your supervision? oh, dear.

carrie said...

Maybe a remodel would help me deal with all that "little" stuff I keep trippin' on!

Have a blast in Hawaii, what island? My only advice, don't eat the poi. But, it sounds like you've been before so you most likely know that already. Hell, maybe you like it, more power to you then! Sounds like great fun for all of you!

Carrie

Christina_the_wench said...

Oh go get drunk on the beach and forget the demolition, er, I mean remodeling going on back home. ~ahem~

Enjoy, dear.

Stephanie A. said...

Enjoy hawaii, though I'm with Margaret and Kevin- I'd be going nuts wanting up-to-the-minute status reports. Seriously.

Pendullum said...

Hugh better own the best state of the art digital camera and it better be poised on the work that is being done so that you can say... 'No Freakin' way did I order Ferrarri red tiles for the bathroom with that gold sink and mirrors!!!!'
But seriously it could be a good peace of mind to see some of the stuff before hand with your handy dandy computer...

And incidently, that is also what I did with all of my daughter's three D art and other drawings, I took pictures of them... and then tossed them... It would be a nightmare trying to keep her native Indian billboard with all the Native plastercine figures pasted on it... I know that years from now, my budding artist will have something to say about how callous I was... But at that time... I hope she will have found herself an apartment to store her wee treasures...

Have a great time for a wee bit of R & R as well aws family events galore... You will need a vacation from the vacation...
The boys must be so excited!!! The ocean and cousins... What better time can there possibly be???

Lisa said...

I can't handle the fruity-yumminess that is the first paragraph in this post! Do SHARE.

This post reminded me of an Eloise book I read to The Baby (HA!)

Enjoy Hawaii - you lucky heifer.

Jenn said...

Hawaii for a month.....the cow!!!

=oP Have fun and try not to think about the remodling.

InterstellarLass said...

Yeah, I totally feel sorry for you for having to spend a month in Hawaii. That must suck. Mwah! Love ya!

I think I would totally freak out not knowing what my house would look like when I came back home. That's why I do all the work myself. Plus I think it's fun. Except the trim work. Painting trim sucks.

sunshine scribe said...

You are killing us with the suspense. Hope you enjoy Hawaii and the move back in after the renos goes well :)

Kristen said...

I'm dying with curiosity about the first part of the post too! LOL.

And have fun visiting the fam in hawaii! I had family in Hawaii, but now they live in Queens (go figure?).

Sandy said...

Soak up some relation time in Hawaii and don't worry about justifying yourself here!!! Just don't forget to post to your loyal fans while you're there! :) Have fun!

Lena said...

Yeah. Blahblahblah HOUSE REMODEL blahblahblah HEAT blahblahblah JOB.

Hawaii.

Still jealous.

Hawaii.

Have a great time. Maybe when you get back we'll be neighbors!

Mel said...

Oh my gah. You're going to Hawaii.
I am now crying softly as I wish you a safe and fun trip.
;)

ninepounddictator said...

Oh, I'm so jealous! I love Hawaii. I spent two months there with my daughter after she was born. I could have spent six months there....you'll love it and enjoy every second!

Recovering Wino said...

Yeah, yeah...a month in Hawaii, relatives or not, is "taking it easy". You cow!

Have some drinks for me. Ha Ha.

Painter Beach Girl said...

Oh HAWAIIIIIII!!!!! That's a place where I dont mind humidity. Have a wonderful time! Wish I knew someone there, say, on Lanai. Instead, I will settle for an upcoming Malibu, Ca trip....enjoy!

Lisa said...

I can decide who I'm more envious of -- you for going to Hawaii or all of the chicks going to BlogHer.

Pattie said...

So the remodeling project explains why you have your own porta potty in the driveway! Yes, I am so jealous! :)

Have a wondeful vacation/family visit to Hawaii. If you have to go away for a month, that is a good place to go! Oh, and drink lots of fruity, tropical beverages....they'll help!

Angry Dad said...

Have a great time out on the Islands. Don't think too much of home. We're thinking of doing a renovation here, but given what you're going through I'm afraid, very afraid!

Karen said...

I would skip Hawaii if it meant leaving my MIL to supervise anything in my house.
about the kids art- I have started scanning some of the lesser exciting pieces & printing them 5x7 style for a little book. it sounds over acheiving, but its brainless work. or instead of fixing supper.

ciodude said...

Wow - no way I could leave the remodeling to someone else for that long..

Ann said...

Better to be away in Hawaii than at home watching people "work" around the house. Enjoy