Monday, June 12, 2006

Is It Really?

When my blog received the Izzy Exteme Makeover, one of the things I thought should change was my profile photo, that, up to then, had been the plumeria flower (explanation of that choice can be found here). I just thought the whole new look deserved a whole new photo as well. I actually was wary of using my own photo and I didn't really have one that I thought was particularly good of me. I chose the one I did because I think it is so very sweet to have an actual documented moment of my beautiful daughter, with her golden skin, kissing me.

I emailed a few friends and asked them if they thought it was lame, or ugly, or just, you know, lame and I recieved very nice feedback that basically said, "No! It's a darling photo what with little gorgeous tan Eva kissing your white as chalk face."

Ok, so what am I supposed to do about the email I received telling me:

Your blog is one of the most obnoxious blogs I have ever read. You obviously think you are better than everyone else out there because you have a nanny and money and you live in Laguna Beach. I bet you also think that you are always the prettiest girl because if you didn't you wouldn't have posted that photo.

I hesitate to even share this because I shouldn't even care about one email with a FAKE RETURN EMAIL ADDRESS.

But, I kind of do. I do because really, this blog? I like it. I like the people I have connected with and this is really one of the only mean things I have ever had said to me. Am I missing something?

I would like to know, do other people get email or comments that aren't merely disagreements with a particular post, but actually personal? If so, how do you handle it?

BTW: To Fake Email Person - Fuck You.

***

Also, do I have to mention how just wrong that email is? I do have a nanny and I live in Laguna Beach, but everything else is just so. Off. Base.


61 comments:

Lena said...

Okay, um hi? I think the best part of this dumb ass email is the part where they unwittingly compliment you! HAHAHA!

Am loving the blog, BTW. Off to your archives!

j.sterling said...

LMFAO- what?!?!! send me that person's email so i could torture them

Anonymous said...

People are freaking idiots. And I love the picture and the makeover. Izzy rocks. And so do you.

Joannah said...

I had a "friend" do something very similar to me lately, but it was in response to a personal email that I sent to several friends. I responded to it directly but nicely, and that "friend" has never acknowledge his/her cowardess in responding to me with the fake email address and an opposing opinion. It wasn't mean, just immature.

Anyway, I think your picture is sweet, and I think it's a shame that some people have to be mean-spirited and judgemental like that.

michele said...

I love the look of your blog, it goes with your Elvis theme (very 60's go go dancers). And the picture of you is very nice.

People can't stand it when others have things that they don't have. Enjoy your blessings and don't worry about someone else's opinion. What they say doesn't really matter, does it? They don't really know you because you only present a small piece of yourself here. How can he (or she) know enough about you to say anything?

Chicky Chicky Baby said...

Mean people suck. I know, its cliche. But its true.

Don't listen, I love that picture of the two of you.

Maggie said...

Oh please. That's just silliness. I don't care where you live. I like your writing, your views, your humor. I like YOU. You can live in Laguna Beach or in a trailer -- you're real and that's all that matters.

And the picture of you and Eva is sweet.

Mel said...

What? Really? That's just idiotic. Well, there's a word for things like that, and it is TROLL. Internet TROLL. Don't worry about it. It's a beautiful picture, and a sweet moment, and I like your redesign.
Don't ever try to defend yourself against these people, hon. First of all, they are liars by default, and second of all, they are, to steal a phrase from Sweetney, probably jerking off right now in sheer delight that they hurt you.

Kim M. said...

Okay this person with the dumb ass e-mail must actually check your blog all the time and resents your witty and charming post and only wishes they were like you. The picture as I said once before is beautiful. By the way when was being pretty a crime? Here's to hoping in about 10 years we are MILF's (check out American Pie if you don't know that one).

Undercover Angel said...

That is so mean that someone sent you that email. I think the makeover looks awesome - and so does the picture. I guess no matter what a person does, other people are still going to be jealous...

I've never received an email like that - but I've read on blogs that other people are...

Jessi said...

It's all jealousy. I've haven't had an e-mail like that (but I've only been doing this for a few weeks) but I know it would get to me.

I love the new picture!

Sparky said...

I'm sorry some asshat felt the need to email you. I've gotten a few nasty comments on my blog by anonymous posters. Blow it off. Assholes are everywhere, even in Blogistan. So what if you're rich, pretty and have a nanny, we should all be so lucky.

Sparky
(green with envy and lovin' you even more)

Andres said...

some foolio (or foolia) got personal on my wife's blog, then proceeded to comment that I didn't have a real job, and then make some racial comments about interracial couples.... blah blah blah... asshats!

M3 said...

Damn lame people! Screw 'em. Who cares what some anonymous person says anyhow.

Love your blog, love ALL the photos, and loving the new look too.

Wendy said...

Well, that person is obviously jealous. I didn't even know you had a nanny, so it's not like you flaunt it. If you did, I probably wouldn't be reading. The picture is cute, are you supposed to be ashamed of that?

Michelle said...

Yeah, Fuck em'. I love your blog, I love that picture, everything. People can be so cruel sometimes, obviously because they are jealous or have some hang ups of their own. That e-mail would totally bother me too so it's kind of funny that my advice is to forget about it and never think of it again. Easier said than done, I know. That sucks that someone made you feel bad. I'm sorry.

Mrs. T said...

To the meanie who sent you that email, I echo your "Fuck You."
I love the blog. Love the photo- how could anyone not?

Pollyanna said...

Exactly. I am pointing to the posts above me. Here's what I want to resay, it's already been said, but anyway,
1. Obviously this person is extremely jealous of you. they are jealous that you have a good life and that you are a great writer who makes us all laugh.
2. I would read you no matter what. I do not care if someone is rich or poor. If I like what they write about and make me laugh from time to time then I am going to keep coming back and reading. Which I do, with your blog, so obviously you're cool with me! :)
3. Again, they are probably just jealous. I am jealous of you too, that you get to have a nanny and an outside fire place, but jealous in a good way. Like I am happy that you are so blessed. I wish I had those things too, but I would never not want YOU to have them just 'cuz I can't. YA KNOW? I am sharing in your joy!
4. I like the pic of you & Eva. It's too cute. I didn't know it was you at first because I was so used to that pretty white flower avator. You look like my SIL BTW.
And 5. Since WHEN is it a crime to be pretty??? I think it's just another example of EXTREME jealousy. How sad for that STUPID LAME IMMATURE person to be so filled with hate and jealousy. I pity them!
oh and 6. SHAME on them! Didn't their mother teach them if you can't say something nice to not say anything at ALL??? HMPH! bad manners really irk me....

Gracencameronsmomy said...

I'm jealous because I LOVE Laguna Beach! And I love you, too! (as much as anyone can who has never met you!!) I also like the new profile picture and I will add my own F-You(I just can't seem to make myself type it out!!) to anonymous...keep up the great blog!!
Lisa

Kelsgarden said...

step back and remember that that email has more to do with them than it ever could do with you -

delete it and let it go, it does not deserve your energy -

Will said...

So the theme I see is that popular, well read blogs get creepy emails. I don't get creepy emails. So when I get my first hateful email I'll know I've made it.

Kevin Charnas said...

THAT FUCKING ASSHOLE...I bet her asshole is SOO BROWN TOO!!! just SMEARED in shit - no bleaching there for THAT bitch.
And what a brave bitch as well, with a bogus email address? It's always the anonymous ones that think they have the guts.
Honestly Kristin, this person is transparent, obviously has issues and is broadcasting her unhappiness. It's actually pretty sad.
Although, if she fucks with my Kristin again, I'm going to have to go Donna Martin on her pathetic ass.
Okay...I think I'm done.

Michelle Fluttering Butterflies said...

That's a wonderful picture, and I like the new look. Had some (brief) unkind comments on my blog, but didn't take any notice and they stopped.

J.D. said...

Kris,

I get hate mail all the time. You'd be surprised what people will say if you dump on their favorite artists or singers.

I'll take a quote from my blog, from Scott Savol of AI4, which embodies my philosophy about this:

"You have to look at it, too, even though they thought you suck, they actually took time to create something that was for you. They could've been somewhere else, home, playing Playstation, whatever, but they came out for you."

You have to admit, that you even motivated them to do something like that, as opposed to just flipping to the next blog and ignoring you, is an accomplishment in and of itself.

Not everybody is gonna like you, but I sure do, and I would hate for you to be discouraged from writing because of some crap-stain out there sending you a little pissy-anty email from a spoofed address.

You rock, your blog rocks, and I will keep reading you until the day one or the other of us dies or stops blogging. Luv ya, Kris!

Johnny said...

Hey, you're perfectly fine by me. As others have echoed,

F-You-and-the-computer-you-wrote-it-on.

There are crazies in every realm.

Also, "coward" for not using a real email address.

Like throwing a rock at a house and running away.

Kel said...

Sweetie, I will echo what other's have said.

Fuck them.

So what if you have a nanny? So what that you live where you live. You have a good life and it works for you.

I love your new picture and I think it's very darling.

So the point is: Don't fret over little asshats.

((hugs))

Kelly Wolfe said...

Whoa, that pisses me off. Why are people so mean? Especially if it was another mom who emailed you that. Aren't our lives hard enough without sisters bringing us down. This makes me hate my gender assuming it was a woman. If it was a man then I will hate that gender.

Lisa

Pendullum said...

Keep up the great blog...
Amazing how a bad comment can ruin all the good ones...
I think your picture rocks of you and your beautiful daughter...
It's sad that there is such cowardess out there with no forwarding e-mail address...
I think you have a great blog and I am looking forward to reading more...

carrie said...

Kristin,

Your blog ROCKS, you ROCK and that coward who commented can just go and blankity-blank themselves until their blankity-blank falls off!

p.s. I "tagged" you, I hope you're not getting sick of these, and I would've "linked" you but I am too stupid and lame to understand the directions blogger gives me for this task, maybe someday I'll figure it out!!! Ha!

Carrie

Sandra said...

Idiot. Someone's a little jealous, no? I have never received an email like this, but then I am not the rockstar that you are... :)

Lisa and Tate said...

You are cute and Eva is a doll.... Why not have a picture??? I love your blog and the new look and the picture...

Bad bad emailer--- shame of you!!!

Lisa

Canadian Mommy said...

they suck! probably just a jelous hag.
Poopoo to them!

Anonymous said...

I think that once you develop any kind of a readership, asshat comments are inevitable.

I delete, delete, delete! (and sometimes change my phone number)

The troll is apparently jealous.

Nikki said...

Kristin, I've gotten a few love letters like this. A couple of them got pretty personal. They really pissed me off. I can relate to what you're saying.

Best advice - tell them off on your blog and let it go.

I love the picture by the way. It's very cute.

Debbie said...

oy. once upon a time, I would've (I thought) oh-so-sagely advised you to ignore said comment, b/c who gives a flying fark what that fuckhead thinks? after all, you obviously have a nice, loyal, loving readership and if all you get is *one* asshole-ish comment, ehhhh.

however, in the present time that is now, I am too very aware of how hurtful even one teensy comment that is a personal attack can be. so - ?

basically, I think it sucks that that stupid, bastardy coward-person would say something like that and then proceed to run away and not leave a trail.

and did I mention, coward? 'cause, COWARD.

oh, and p.s. (and I am aware that you weren't fishing): you and your daughter are gorgeous and adorable. (obviously, COWARD commenter is just a lot green with envy.)

Anonymous said...

Well, I guess "fuck 'em" has been said enough, so I won't ... oops.

I really like that pic. It's the sweetest thing.

Anonymous said...

Oh, whoops, "anonymous" was me. Abby. sheesh.

Melissa said...

I think it is just wrong. I think you're daughter is adorable, and there is nothing wrong with living in Laguna Beach or having a nanny. Sheesh, people need to get a life. Try not to take it personally, I have had emails and comments that are so freaking mean. But most people are nice.

Pink Evita said...

Keep doing what your doing. I for one love reading. A good read is a good read, period. Those who can write...should.

Hey, you have a nanny? How did I miss that one? Man, I want a nanny. But not in an evil I hate you for having a nanny sort of way. More in a how cool maybe she'll tell me how she fanaggled a nanny. In my next life...I'm getting a nanny.

Heather said...

I'll just cite "rule #1" on this one (said rule being that people are stupid).

I've read blogs I didn't like, and have also noticed that there's a handy thing in your browswer that allows you to move on if don't like a site. Amazing!

Lucky for me my blog isn't interesting enough to draw any ire. (or maybe I don't have much to be jealous of?) Either way I'm glad. The picture is gorgeous, don't believe anyone who tells you otherwise.

Antique Mommy said...

Trolls with no talent and nothing to say. And ugly too or they'd post a picture, right? Best to ignore them. They need sunlight and attention to thrive. You on the other hand are a fabulous writer and I love your new look and the picture. I haven't gotten an email like that because I'm too inconsequential! Yay for being inconsequential!

Kristin said...

Thank you so much... all of you have made me feel a lot better and I think the prevailing wisdom of "pay them no mind" is my new motto!

penguininthesun said...

jerk, jerk, jerk.

at least you know so many people would take your side over that

jerk, jerk, jerk!

you're cool and funny! un like that.....

ditzymoi said...

im late as usual but heres my 2 cents anyways ...
i love your new site and your picture is adorable and from the day that i posted a comment here you have been nothing but courteous to me and even took the time to answer me personaly in email. i admit im jealous over the nanny thing lol but that doesnt mean it gives me or anyone else the right to attack you...youve never been full of yourself or obnoxious with it ...ever!
people who do the "anonymous" thing are chicken shit rat bastards with no balls :) *hugs* please dont have your feelings hurt

Anonymous said...

Beautiful make over all around, especially the photo. Isn't it funny, you can receive 100 compliments and one anon. asshole stands out in your mind.

So are you thinking it was a two faced friend??

Ava's family said...

What a chicken shit for using a fake email address (I don't think I have used those words since High School)! I love your blog, love the picture, love your sense of humor and wish I lived in Laguna Beach! Shake it off! Stupid people are EVERYWHERE(even the blog world)!

Anonymous said...

You've arrived! Your first troll...I'm so proud for you. :) Gotta just take it with a grain of salt and laugh it off. Did you see the comments I got this week from my "Shiloh Pitt is not that Cute" post. Apparently the dutch hate me...but I did get my first international hate mail (by the way...all Americans are animals in case you didn't know that) and it kind of cracked me up. I ALWAYS respond to the trolls since it's so easy to roast a heckler.

By the way, you and your little one are beautiful. Thanks for sharing.

petite gourmand said...

when I first started my blog (2nd entry) I got this completely bitchy and judgemental comment.
I almost decided to ditch the whole "blogging" thing altogether.
I'm glad I didn't.
but it's hard not to take stuff so personally.
who knows what motivates these morons?

Chicky said...

You've already recieved the perfect advice, so I can't help you there. But the picture?? GOR-GEOUS!!!

rubyiscoming said...

People suck. Anonymous (how VERY brave of the person!) is stupid. Yes, I resort to 4-year olds comebacks when people act like imbeciles.

You are da best thing out here in bloggy land. Keep on keepin' on, chica!

Wes said...

Ok Kristin, you have like over 50 comments here saying how great you are. Surely that's gotta outweigh some dweeb who won't even admit to who he/she is!

Shelley said...

"Fake email person" appears to have issues that clearly transcend your blog. Nothin you can do about that.

But you can keep on blogging. I enjoy your blog and your candor. Plus, you're a nice person who is nuts about her family. Nothing wrong with that.

BTW - Me loves the new blog makeover. :)

Shell

Perstephone said...

I'm so not cool enough to get hate mail yet. So far I've had one bad comment on my site about how intellectually challenged I am. Otherwise, yeah, I'm lame in blogland.

And obviously that person hasn't been reading your blog because, personally, you really are one of my favorite reads!

Mama Melissa said...

I think it is a GREAT pic!!! :D I can't wait til my daughter is here to take pics with.

Melissa
LID 10/31/05
babyheaton.blogspot.com

Anonymous said...

Okay. I actually had a commenter insult my husband's career, our religon and my appearance in one comment.

Asshats get personal. That's why they're asshats.

Anonymous said...

Darling it’s called jealously. Some people can’t handle it when they see beautiful happy well off families and they feel that they must vent.

I LOVE your blog. When I discovered it, I spend hours reading through your archives. I love your humor and wit. You also have a very beautiful family!

That photo is one of the sweetest ones I’ve seen.

Ignore the ignorant petty people and blog on!

Alexandra

Becky at lifeoutoffocus said...

screw them. your blog rocks

Tori said...

Well...
You are a freak-magnet...
I think you knew this would happen. Remember how we debated on the sofa about whether or not you should post the picture!
Only you would receive the hate mail...
Anyway - the lady - she know nothing about you....
she a crazy bitch.....

mollymcmo said...

OMG! what a bitch!!!!
I LOVE your blog and the profile pic is amazing :)
I don't "know" you, but i have to say from what i've read you are funny and just a sweet person.

yes, fuck her.

want me to kick her ass? I will, not that i'm a great ass kicker or anything, but i could do it, yes, i think i could :)

m

Yano said...

That's so hilarious. I'm a first time reader and I've read enough of your blog to know that this person is way off base. Some people are just bitter and need to spread that around!

Mom101 said...

I know I'm late to this party, but my suggestion is that you ignore the trolls. Delete the comments, dont' respond, don't give it another thought. You're too loving and giving and BUSY raising a family and entertaining us with your writing to devote energy to the energy-suckers of the world. It's a strange person who posts a comment like this that's much over 15.