Friday, May 26, 2006

It's Been A Week I Tell You...

Hello. Everything in my life is breaking. In fact, just reading this may cause your computer to crash (Hello, Kevin!) or maybe your car, or your phone, or your home improvement budget.

On Monday it was my car. Eva and I were tooling along, heading to Target, when poof my car just turned off. I barely coasted (because the steering locked) to the side of the road and then Eva and I just sort of looked at each other and went, "the hell?". Well, actually, I said, "What the fuck just happened here?" So, I called Hugh (because he could really do something from his office) and he called the car repair place and the end result is that the key was not speaking nicely to the ignition system and instead of saying, "Hi! I'm the key to this car and let's go!" It was apparently saying, "I may be the key, I may not be the key...ha ha ha, joke could be on you car!" The car responded with, "Fuck You" & turned itself off.

The universal response from my husband and my parents is, "Oh my GOD! You need a new car!" So, I guess when we get back from Hawaii I'll be getting a new one which is just great because the panic attack I suffered when we bought my current car is something I look forward to revisiting.

On Tuesday, it was my cell phone. The little slot that you plug the charger into? Well, the connector in mine just sort of fell out. It hung on with a strong charge for a couple more days, but I was eventually forced into the Verizon store and a good lesson learned is not to take your 2 year old phone shopping with you or you could very well end up coming home with an orchid colored Razr. With matching phone charger, hands free headset and protective case. Have I mentioned that I am 36 and that makes this purchase not cute, but rather, sad.

Moving on... did you know when you set out to remodel anything everything costs approximately eleventy billion times more than you anticipated? This especially happens when you decide to put in TEAK flooring. There is probably more expensive hardwood out there but I believe it is from a sacred forest and Angelina Jolie is in charge of protecting it.

Also, hey! Let's change out those front windows! And 2 outdoor fireplaces are better than 1... one for the courtyard and one out by the pool! What is the priciest bathroom tile? Whatever it is, we apparently must have it. We must also have a zinc countertop for the outdoor sink and as fun as remodeling is, it is stressing my husband out and his mantra has become: as long as it fits in the budget.

Add in the, "Please prayerfully consider a 50k donation to the school" campaign we've considered and have decided that debtors prison is no place for a couple with 2 outdoor fireplaces so let's just say that the school is getting less than they asked for and the new car and shit... life costs a lot of fucking money.

Where am I? Am I up to Thursday? Thursday would be the day the pool heater went on the blink and as I type this I am awaiting the arrival of both my pool man and my plumber. Friday of a holiday weekend... sigh.

But, Thursday was not all bad, in fact, Thursday kicked ass because Jake passed his qualifying swim test for Junior Lifeguards. Now, you might think, "so?", but let me preface this by telling you this is what I was stressing about because the poor child failed it 3 times but bless his determined little heart... he kept practicing and trying and last night, the last possible qualifying test date, he not only passed it he kicked that test's ass and I swear to you it was one of the best moments of my life. My child kept at something, he worked for something and I am so proud of him that it makes my heart hurt. I learned something from my son last night and I am honored to be his mother.

So, here we are, it's Friday. I have picked out a new car, I have a new phone, we are still within our budget and my children rock. Tomorrow is my 11th wedding anniversary, I love my husband and despite the things that break, we are still strong.


Tune in tomorrow for (YIKES)... wedding photos!

41 comments:

kim said...

Thanks Kristin :) You make me laugh! Im glad to have stumbled across your page, It's one of those things I check regularly so I don't miss out! Congrats on the perseverence lesson well taught *hugs*

Nikki said...

HOORAY! GOOD FOR HIM.

While not quite as spectacular, my daughter, who just turned 8, has finally learned to ride a bike. (coordiantion does not run in our family)

Melissa said...

SOunds like a crappy week. Hopefully next week will be better. Love the car thing. My dad is a mechanic, he always tells me to talk nicely to my car.

Wait a minute....you got the pink razor and you are not thrilled. I am very saddend by this. I sooooooo want that phone. I have been considering breaking mine, just to get that one.

Stephanie said...

Same thing happend to my Accord last year. Luckily, it cut out right in front of a police station.

I don't know when you are heading to Hawaii, but we are leaving this weekend. Hey, maybe we will be there at the same time!

f said...

I am fond of the mental image on Angelina guarding a sacred forest.

Margaret said...

You know I'd feel badly for you if your problems didn't include a POOL and OUTDOOR fireplaces. Mmmm yeah, not feeling too sorry for ya'. :-)

Sounds like everything worked out though. Thanks for the Angelina Jolie laugh. Happy Anniversary!

Gracencameronsmomy said...

Hope your hiliday weekend is better than this week! Good for Jake! That is a hard test!
Lisa

eastcoastermomma said...

Hey, I agree with Melissa - the pink razor is so cute!

Congrats to your son!

What kind of car are you going to get and when are you going to Hawaii (beeyotch!)?

savymanda said...

Sending sympathy (but secretly being snarky cuz you are complaining about broken stuff that I covet) =)

Yeah Jake! That part teared me up...I am an emotional 'tard.

Have fun in Hawaii. Don't break it.

jennster said...

holy crap.. what a week! HAPPY ANNIVERSARY! can't wait for pics!

Kevin Charnas said...

Excellent! Not the breaking of every-fucking-thing, but your son and BRAVO! for his determination...and BRAVA! for your anniversary - Happy Anniversary!! Sorry about all the other shit, but you know it's just shit... Donna Martin, you've got your priorities in order...
And as for perseverance? In my play, I quoted someone...I forget her name...or his name... anyway, it says, "Genius, the ability to dazzle human eyes is oft but perseverance in disguise..."
So HOORAY for your son's fierce spirit!

northern stargirl said...

Your kid's school asked you for fifty thousand dollars? Are you freaking serious? Holy Shit!!!

Kristin said...

Northen Stargirl -

Well, yes, they did. They asked every family in the school... there is major reconstruction happening at the school and the parents need to raise quite a bit of money in order to receive a matching "gift" and then the construction loan...

As much as I wish we had that kind of cash growing on the backyard money tree, we have had to give much ,much less.

Tori said...

Hello my friend.
I have been blog-sent for a few days while dealing with crazy stuff!
Anyway - I just did my meme from the Chickster and lo and behold I wrote practically the same thing as you about a bollywood movie. I swear I hadn't even looked at yours yet! I chose Monsoon Wedding though but Bride would be fab too!
And...like....because we are ....like soooooooo.... connected.... YOU can so come on my island instead of the dog or Ellen Degeneres....

Oh and congrats on getting through the week of doom - complete with life lesson from Jake.

And by the way - you soooooooo would be shagging George Clooney.

carrie said...

The week is over, the weekend is here and it sounds like you have some celebrating to do! Happy Anniversary and better luck next week!

Congrats to Jake on the swimming test, what a proud Mama you must be!:) BTW, he's very handsome (my boys don't want to be called "cute" anymore, sigh, they're growing up!

Johnny said...

Details on car! Details on home destruction, errr...improvement. But, weren't you going to give me comparative photos of the renovation?

Antique Mommy said...

I'm sorry to have snorted coffee out of my nose laughing at your very bad horrible week. My crappy weeks are not nearly that funny. Great post.

Mom101 said...

Whatever is going wrong with your renovations, the result sounds like it will be amaaaaaazing. Invite me over for outdoor fireplace-roasted marshmallows anytime.

Michelle said...

Happy Anniversary! You're only three years behind my husband and me.We celebrated lucky thirteen in Feb. Yes, as a matter of fact we DID get married when I was twelve!:) That's so cool about the Jr. Lifegaurds test. Several kids from my school took it too, and I understand it is quite difficult. Good for him!

Gracencameronsmomy said...

Ok, I really need a "comment spell check" button. Also, I might have to stop reading you because you are getting too popular! I like to read the "small persons" blog! (like mine!)
Lisa

Lena said...

OH! You had the same week I did! Except instead of my car breaking down, the windsheild cracked, the tire went flat, and my husband agreed to let a DOOR TO DOOR SALESMAN fix a dent. Which destroyed the paint. Awesome!

Here's to next week being even mildly better. Cheers!

Shelley said...

Yay Jake! Congratulations - That is one great accomplishment!

Kristin, I think you're right about that universal response. "Let's buy a new one" is Rich's response to everything that breaks or could someday break. :)

Happy Anniversary. I hope all our bad luck this year hasn't rubbed off on you. :)

Shell

crouching mother hidden diva said...

Can you believe you guys have already been married 900 years...oh, you haven't? Oh, it just seems like it. Amen sister!

Jodi said...

HAPPY ANNIVERSARY! Awesome. And shame on your car, your cell phone, and your remodel for making your life a living hell. Good job on the junior lifeguard thing too, very very cool.

Mega Mom said...

I'm with Margaret and Savymanda...BRAT! :))

That Jake is one heck of a cute kiddo. Yeah for him!

Oh and have fun in *clenched teeth* Hawaaaiiii.

Nicki said...

It was 11 years ago I fit in that size nothing dress you made me wear? Where or where did my figure go...... And I took scissors to your gazillion dollar veil bc your gazillion dollar wedding planner didn't have the balls.... Congrats to my fab friends on their anniversary!

And to Jake for making the Junior Guards- every little so cal boys dream!

mollymcmommy said...

damn, what a week you had. waiting for pics! :)

m

Izzy said...

did you know when you set out to remodel anything everything costs approximately eleventy billion times more than you anticipated?

lololol...totally true!


Congrats on the new car and happy anniverary!!!!

Kevin Charnas said...

I don't know why it just dawned on me that the kid's school asked for a 50k donation from EACH family??? I'm must have been overloaded about all the other shit that you had to spend money on this past week! 50k from EACH...damn...shit...holy-damn-shit.

Holly said...

Way to go Jake! He's my hero right now. I could also take a lesson from the child....

So what ring tone do you have on that pink Razor of yours? (snickering) Britt or Jess?

Jenny said...

Hey, my cell phone connector-thingie broke this week too! Maybe you really are contagious...

kim said...

i missed the whole 50 big ones thing too? and its mondayyyyy and theres no picturessssss :)

sunshine scribe said...

What a week! I love how you can find humour in such a corncopia of crappiness!

But Happy anniversary to you and your husband :)

Undercover Angel said...

It sounds like last week was a crappy week for you. Look on the bright side - at least you didn't break any bones - knock on wood...

Hopefully, you had a peaceful weekend and this week will be better for you.

Lisa said...

LOVE that photo! Sounds like a bad week. Hope next week is better!

Jodie said...

First, YAY JAKE! Good job buddy!

Second, Happy Anniversary to you and your husband! Brian and I will be 11 years married this year too!

Another thing we have in common...I bought the pink Razr this weekend too! Ha!

The Silent K said...

Oh my god, he is one handsome little dude.

J.D. said...

NOTHING good can come from a visit to the Verizon store. NOTHING.

On the other hand, the last time I went was when I was subscribing the first time, and I told them to give me a free phone or give me Cingular, and rather than lose me altogether, they gave me the crap phone that I now have.

J.D. said...

By the way, Kris, I was really happy with my record-high 33 comments on one post until I realized this one now has 39. You suck.

Bonnie B said...

LOL it's nice to know these kind of weeks follow everyone around once in a while.
Congrats to your son!
Have fun car shopping.

Gen said...

Kristin!

YOU gave me this crappy luck this week ;) I swear off blogging for the weekend only to have the week from HELL...and it sounds a lot like your nutty week.

only thing is...where is my trip to HAWAII???????? And my new car???

Happy Anniversary!