Hello. Everything in my life is breaking. In fact, just reading this may cause your computer to crash (Hello, Kevin!) or maybe your car, or your phone, or your home improvement budget.
On Monday it was my car. Eva and I were tooling along, heading to Target, when poof my car just turned off. I barely coasted (because the steering locked) to the side of the road and then Eva and I just sort of looked at each other and went, "the hell?". Well, actually, I said, "What the fuck just happened here?" So, I called Hugh (because he could really do something from his office) and he called the car repair place and the end result is that the key was not speaking nicely to the ignition system and instead of saying, "Hi! I'm the key to this car and let's go!" It was apparently saying, "I may be the key, I may not be the key...ha ha ha, joke could be on you car!" The car responded with, "Fuck You" & turned itself off.
The universal response from my husband and my parents is, "Oh my GOD! You need a new car!" So, I guess when we get back from Hawaii I'll be getting a new one which is just great because the panic attack I suffered when we bought my current car is something I look forward to revisiting.
On Tuesday, it was my cell phone. The little slot that you plug the charger into? Well, the connector in mine just sort of fell out. It hung on with a strong charge for a couple more days, but I was eventually forced into the Verizon store and a good lesson learned is not to take your 2 year old phone shopping with you or you could very well end up coming home with an orchid colored Razr. With matching phone charger, hands free headset and protective case. Have I mentioned that I am 36 and that makes this purchase not cute, but rather, sad.
Moving on... did you know when you set out to remodel anything everything costs approximately eleventy billion times more than you anticipated? This especially happens when you decide to put in TEAK flooring. There is probably more expensive hardwood out there but I believe it is from a sacred forest and Angelina Jolie is in charge of protecting it.
Also, hey! Let's change out those front windows! And 2 outdoor fireplaces are better than 1... one for the courtyard and one out by the pool! What is the priciest bathroom tile? Whatever it is, we apparently must have it. We must also have a zinc countertop for the outdoor sink and as fun as remodeling is, it is stressing my husband out and his mantra has become: as long as it fits in the budget.
Add in the, "Please prayerfully consider a 50k donation to the school" campaign we've considered and have decided that debtors prison is no place for a couple with 2 outdoor fireplaces so let's just say that the school is getting less than they asked for and the new car and shit... life costs a lot of fucking money.
Where am I? Am I up to Thursday? Thursday would be the day the pool heater went on the blink and as I type this I am awaiting the arrival of both my pool man and my plumber. Friday of a holiday weekend... sigh.
But, Thursday was not all bad, in fact, Thursday kicked ass because Jake passed his qualifying swim test for Junior Lifeguards. Now, you might think, "so?", but let me preface this by telling you this is what I was stressing about because the poor child failed it 3 times but bless his determined little heart... he kept practicing and trying and last night, the last possible qualifying test date, he not only passed it he kicked that test's ass and I swear to you it was one of the best moments of my life. My child kept at something, he worked for something and I am so proud of him that it makes my heart hurt. I learned something from my son last night and I am honored to be his mother.
So, here we are, it's Friday. I have picked out a new car, I have a new phone, we are still within our budget and my children rock. Tomorrow is my 11th wedding anniversary, I love my husband and despite the things that break, we are still strong.
Tune in tomorrow for (YIKES)... wedding photos!