Saturday, December 24, 2005

She's from Laguna


Yesterday, the kids and I headed out for some last minute shopping (read: all the holiday shopping) and while I was being rung up by a particularly obnoxious woman... a woman who was convinved that Jack's fumbling with the little attached-to-the-credit-card-machine pen would break the whole thing leaving them no choice but to, "close down the store and lose
jobs"... she annoyed me so much that, in the interest of holiday spirit, I let Jack swipe my Visa, forge my signature, and press "accept".

Meanwhile... there is another sales clerk talking to Jake... now Jake is pushing Eva in her stroller and this woman is just DYING to know our family makeup... she is asking all these leading questions and here is how the conversation played out:

Sales Girl-Is she your sister?
Jake- Yes.
SG- She is so cute
J- Yes.
SG- She doesn't look like you.
J- Heh.
SG-Her eyes are so pretty (c'mon lady... that is pathetic!)
J-Yes. (God, I love this kid!)
SG-She is so exotic looking...
J-Heh.
SG- Well, where is she from?
J-Laguna Beach.

At this point I was feeling no mercy for the sales staff at a store which shall remain nameless (but it rhymes with "RICOS") so I merely gathered my purchases and "Happy Holiday-ed" our goodbyes.

Laguna Beach... hahahahaha!!!!!!!!

Merry Christmas!

5 comments:

crouching mother hidden diva said...

That's quite possibly the most hilarious thing I have ever read. Laguna Beach....I love Jake.

Collene said...

Kristen -- ya' kill me with your writng talents!

As for my "exotic" and most precious Chinese daughter, one of her cousins said to me at the height of insanity late Christmas day at Mom-Mom Rita's house, "She looks like you!"

This was one of three sisters who fought like crazy to be able to play with Gianna as if she were a doll and are as scrumptious in their unedited inner beauty as they are with their outter beauty.

When I rcv' the comment/question is she from China I don't take offense but nicely offer, she's from Berwyn (PA) and was born in China.

Keep on killin' us with your word-smithing!!!!

Anonymous said...

I want to know what store you are talking about. I have thought and thought but can't come up with anything. Is it nationwide?

Anonymous said...

Finally I can blog back atch-ya...
Jake doesn't suffer fools gladly much like his mother and especially like Grandpa Jim.
I mean where did she think she was from? China or something?
Imbecile!
Tori

Hula Doula said...

What an adorable little girl (and boy for that matter!!)